As I sit here watching cartoon's with Brooklynn I just really feel like being lazy, another part of me really misses my mom this day, yesterday I seemed pretty alright, but today I know I have had a meltdown already, but I'm really trying to stay happy today. My mom wouldn't want these constant breakdowns. I am mostly happy that she is not in pain anymore, that is the only plus in this situation. She isnt feeling the constant pain and sickness of the cancer attacking her. But I am horrible saddened that she isnt here with me.
I'm sad she isnt here to spend time with Brooklynn and answer the phone call when I need her. She wont be there when I graduate college, something she wanted to see so bad. She wont be here when I have another child (whenever that is), and she wont be here to watch Brooklynn go to school and become all she can be. Thats the part that makes me sad. She is not physically here with me anymore.

Well just checking in, I'll post a tad more later, but off to write about "patient's rights to die." Oh I hope this turns out alright :)